I like taking pictures. I should do this more often! Maybe I'll come up with some interesting backgrounds and take tons of pictures of my pocket-watch! :)
Wednesday, December 26, 2012
Pocket-Watch
I did a photo shoot of my new pocket-watch just for you. It was fun! Here are the best pictures:
It's the day after Christmas, and all through the house...
:)
We were actually supposed to be driving to Texas today, but the bad weather through Oklahoma delayed us for a day :(. But that means I have a chance to tell you about my Christmas day!
My youngest siblings were up at 6:40 in the Christmas morning excitement. They weren't allowed to go into my parents' room until seven (the door was actually locked). I didn't get up till around 7:30 and it was about 8 by the time we all gathered around the tree. Before breakfast, we did the first part of our gift exchange. Every year we draw names and get presents for the one person we drew. Mom and Dad get presents for the kids too, but it is so much fun to just have one person to focus on and find something you know they'll like. I had Olivia and got her the whole Chronicles of Narnia series, since they're the first books she's actually enjoyed reading. Avery got me a really awesome pocket-watch necklace that I'd seen before and loved, so that was exciting. Unfortunately, I forgot to take a picture of it, so you'll have to wait to see it till I do. Unless I wear it somewhere before then (which is very possible...)
Anyway, after that, we had a wonderful breakfast of Dad's homemade cinnamon rolls. YUM! Then before we dove into the rest of the gifts, we took some time to act out the Christmas Story, one of our few traditions. I memorized Luke's account of the Jesus' birth over the past two weeks, so I was nominated as narrator. Dad was Joseph, Mom was Mary, a baby-doll was baby Jesus, Sam and Olivia were shepherds, Jake was a sheep (sort of...) and Avery was an angel. It was a rather rowdy reenactment, partially from the 'sheep' barking at the shepherds and partially from the shepherds' excitement about the presents to come after, but it was still good. At least, I enjoyed thinking about Jesus' birth again. I always do. Mom also read a passage from Romans about God's love (I think it was from chapter 5...?)
When we finished, we opened the rest of the presents. My biggest (and probably most exciting) present came from my parents.
We were actually supposed to be driving to Texas today, but the bad weather through Oklahoma delayed us for a day :(. But that means I have a chance to tell you about my Christmas day!
My youngest siblings were up at 6:40 in the Christmas morning excitement. They weren't allowed to go into my parents' room until seven (the door was actually locked). I didn't get up till around 7:30 and it was about 8 by the time we all gathered around the tree. Before breakfast, we did the first part of our gift exchange. Every year we draw names and get presents for the one person we drew. Mom and Dad get presents for the kids too, but it is so much fun to just have one person to focus on and find something you know they'll like. I had Olivia and got her the whole Chronicles of Narnia series, since they're the first books she's actually enjoyed reading. Avery got me a really awesome pocket-watch necklace that I'd seen before and loved, so that was exciting. Unfortunately, I forgot to take a picture of it, so you'll have to wait to see it till I do. Unless I wear it somewhere before then (which is very possible...)
Anyway, after that, we had a wonderful breakfast of Dad's homemade cinnamon rolls. YUM! Then before we dove into the rest of the gifts, we took some time to act out the Christmas Story, one of our few traditions. I memorized Luke's account of the Jesus' birth over the past two weeks, so I was nominated as narrator. Dad was Joseph, Mom was Mary, a baby-doll was baby Jesus, Sam and Olivia were shepherds, Jake was a sheep (sort of...) and Avery was an angel. It was a rather rowdy reenactment, partially from the 'sheep' barking at the shepherds and partially from the shepherds' excitement about the presents to come after, but it was still good. At least, I enjoyed thinking about Jesus' birth again. I always do. Mom also read a passage from Romans about God's love (I think it was from chapter 5...?)
When we finished, we opened the rest of the presents. My biggest (and probably most exciting) present came from my parents.
I am so excited!!!! I've been wanting to do this ever since we finished OYAN and I finally can! I'm not sure if I'll start when school picks up again or if I'll try to get farther on the other novel I've started. Oh, I suppose I should explain what Other Worlds is :). It's a follow-up curriculum to One Year Adventure Novel. It builds on the ideas taught in OYAN but is specifically focused on how to write Sci-fi and Fantasy :D.
Another exciting present is this:
The Wingfeather Saga by Andrew Peterson. I've read the books before and I have them all on my kindle, but I thought it would be neat to have hard copies of all my favorite books (so I could annotate them if I wanted to). So that's what I asked for for Christmas (yes, all my favorite books.) The Wingfeather Saga is one of my favorite series one, because it's fantasy, two, because it's a good story, and three, because the author's voice is so fun to read. He develops the plot at a good pace, the characters are likable and yet still flawed, and his fantasy world is also well-developed. His writing is often very humorous (for example, the introductions at the beginning of the first book--hilarious!) but he still conveys dread at the moments it's needed and the bad guys are bad. The flow of the words is very easy to read and understand and it does an amazing job of creating a 'movie' in your head. There are sweet parts, scary parts, sad parts, moving parts, funny parts. I don't feel like I'm doing an adequate job of describing them. Andrew Peterson is one of my favorite authors. Yes, I'm re-reading these books (if you look closely, you can see the top of my bookmark in On the Edge of the Dark Sea of Darkness). No, you can't borrow them till I'm finished. Lucky for you, the Manhattan Public Library has all three. Except they're all checked out right now by one of my friends to whom I recommended them.
In the evening, we went to our 'Kansas family''s house and enjoyed a night full of good food, great friends, and fun games. A highlight to remember for many, many years!
Well, I have lots of reading and writing to do in the near future! I hope you all had Christmases as merry as mine. God bless you in this coming year!
Now, GO READ THE WINGFEATHER SAGA!!!!! ;D
Thursday, December 13, 2012
How I Deal with Imperfection in My Stories
Ignore it.
You may be noticing that many of my posts involve my lack of motivation to work on my stories. I've been thinking a lot about my novel from last year (and not a lot about the new one I'm supposed to be working on). I'd really like to do more with, well, any of my stories, but whenever I heave free time, I tend to use it on something like reading books or looking at stuff online. Yes, some of that is researching stuff for my new novel, but no, most of it not productive. I think one thing that was discouraging about Aubrinn's story (for lack of a better title) was that I had (and still have) so many problems that it doesn't feel like it will ever be finished. I'll just keep finding new problems. And I'm not even to the nit-picky stuff yet!
But like I said, I'd like to get it as finished as I can. And not doing anything with it is not going to help. I guess I just know it's going to be hard and I don't want to have to figure all the problems out. It's easier to just ignore them. But that only works for so long.
I think my fear of problems is also a factor in my hesitation in working on any new stories. As a perfectionist, I don't enjoy doing things I can't do really well the on first try. And editing shows me that my writing ISN'T perfect. I don't really expect it to be perfect, but I don't like seeing how far it has to go either! And I'd love to have people read it and help me edit, but seriously, the document is so full of notes to myself, holes, and highlights marking what I need to change, I think it would be hard to decipher the story!
Well, for now you'll have to settle for my synopsis. I just typed it up for someone else, so I figured I might as well put it here too. At least you'll get an idea of what it's about (or supposed to be about)!
"Princess Aubrinn is heir to the throne of her father’s kingdom, Alendais. At 16 years of age, Aubrinn believes she is old enough to take on more responsibility in helping her parents rule. The king and queen think otherwise. Aubrinn loves to lead and help people, but she despises etiquette and lessons in protocol, and her mother is determined to improve Aubrinn’s ladylike skills before the princess becomes queen. Aubrinn prefers adventure. Or so she thinks.
You may be noticing that many of my posts involve my lack of motivation to work on my stories. I've been thinking a lot about my novel from last year (and not a lot about the new one I'm supposed to be working on). I'd really like to do more with, well, any of my stories, but whenever I heave free time, I tend to use it on something like reading books or looking at stuff online. Yes, some of that is researching stuff for my new novel, but no, most of it not productive. I think one thing that was discouraging about Aubrinn's story (for lack of a better title) was that I had (and still have) so many problems that it doesn't feel like it will ever be finished. I'll just keep finding new problems. And I'm not even to the nit-picky stuff yet!
But like I said, I'd like to get it as finished as I can. And not doing anything with it is not going to help. I guess I just know it's going to be hard and I don't want to have to figure all the problems out. It's easier to just ignore them. But that only works for so long.
I think my fear of problems is also a factor in my hesitation in working on any new stories. As a perfectionist, I don't enjoy doing things I can't do really well the on first try. And editing shows me that my writing ISN'T perfect. I don't really expect it to be perfect, but I don't like seeing how far it has to go either! And I'd love to have people read it and help me edit, but seriously, the document is so full of notes to myself, holes, and highlights marking what I need to change, I think it would be hard to decipher the story!
Well, for now you'll have to settle for my synopsis. I just typed it up for someone else, so I figured I might as well put it here too. At least you'll get an idea of what it's about (or supposed to be about)!
"Princess Aubrinn is heir to the throne of her father’s kingdom, Alendais. At 16 years of age, Aubrinn believes she is old enough to take on more responsibility in helping her parents rule. The king and queen think otherwise. Aubrinn loves to lead and help people, but she despises etiquette and lessons in protocol, and her mother is determined to improve Aubrinn’s ladylike skills before the princess becomes queen. Aubrinn prefers adventure. Or so she thinks.
Another person in Alendais desires
the throne: Aubrinn’s treacherous cousin,
Tynon. Tynon and his surreptitious plans prove a threat not just to Aubrinn’s position but also to her
entire kingdom. Will Aubrinn learn what she truly needs to lead her people in
time to stop Tynon? What will she have to give up to keep Alendais out of Tynon’s selfish hands?"
Friday, December 7, 2012
Now you finally get to read this!
Luke is one of my favorite books of the Bible. I love the way Luke, the author, tells the stories and includes details about people. Yesterday morning, Mom read us part of the first chapter of Luke, the beginning of the Christmas story. At the very beginning, though, Luke gives an introduction to his book:
"Many have undertaken to draw up an account of the things that have been fulfilled among us, just as they were handed down to us by those who from the first were eyewitnesses and servants of the word. Therefore, since I myself have carefully investigated everything from the beginning, it seemed good also to me to write an orderly account for you, most excellent Theophilus, so that you may know the certainty of the things you have been taught."
At another point yesterday morning, Mom had pointed out to me that I'm a researcher. I like taking the time to look stuff up and really understand and think about what I'm writing or talking about. She's absolutely right. But after reading these verses, I understand better why I like Luke--he researched it, made sure he knew what he was talking about, and he wrote it as a letter, which is an awesome way to tell a story!
Well, now that you know I like the book of Luke and a few reasons why, I'll get on with the story. So, Luke 1 is about the angel Gabriel's appearances to both the priest Zechariah and Mary, the future mother of Jesus. This is what Luke says about Zechariah and his wife Elizabeth:
"In the time of Herod king of Judea there was a priest named Zechariah, who belonged to the priestly division of Abijah; his wife Elizabeth was also a descendant of Aaron. Both of them were upright in the sight of God, observing all the Lord's commandments and regulations blamelessly. But they had no children, because Elizabeth was barren; and they were both well along in years."
Basically, they followed all of God's commands, yet he had not blessed them with what was considered one of the greatest in that day: children.
The story continues, and Zechariah, as a priest is selected to enter the Holy Place in the Temple to burn incense before the Lord. As he was performing his duty, an angel appeared to him and told him that his wife Elizabeth would become pregnant and give birth to a son, who was to be named John. The angel told Zechariah that his son would "be great in the sight of the Lord", that he would "be filled with the Holy Spirit even from birth", and that he would "go on before the Lord, in the spirit and power of Elijah, to turn the hearts of the fathers to their children and the disobedient to the wisdom of the righteous--to make ready a people prepared for the Lord." Zechariah was obviously surprised, but he didn't necessarily believe this message, as we see from his reply:
"Zechariah asked the angel, 'How can I be sure of this? I am an old man and my wife is well along in years.'" (Notice he didn't call her "old" also ;))
"The angel answered, 'I am Gabriel. I stand in the presence of God, and I have been sent to speak to you and to tell you this good news. And now you will be silent and not able to speak until the day this happens, because you did not believe my words, which will come true at their proper time.'"
And so it happened. Everything the Gabriel said would happen did. Six months later, Gabriel went to Nazareth, in Galilee, "to a virgin pledged to be married to a man named Joseph, a descendant of David. The virgin's name was Mary." Listen to this greeting:
"The angel went to her and said, 'Greetings, you who are highly favored! The Lord is with you.'"
Now, compare Mary's reaction with Zechariah's:
Zechariah: "When Zechariah saw him, he was startled and was gripped with fear."
Mary: "Mary was greatly troubled at his words and wondered what kind of greeting this might be."
Gabriel gave Mary this message:
"Do not be afraid, Mary, you have found favor with God. You will be with child and give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus. He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his father David, and he will reign over the house of Jacob forever; his kingdom will never end."
(You're probably noticing that I'm doing less paraphrasing now and more quoting. That's because it's just that good the way it is.)
What an incredible message! As well as confusing and somewhat frightening, I would think. This is what Mary said:
"How will this be," Mary asked the angel, "since I am a virgin?"
Very logical. Now, look at the differences between Zechariah's "How?" and Mary's "How?" Zechariah asked, "How do I know this will happen?" Mary asked, "How is that possible?" Mary didn't question whether or not it would happen, she was just wondering how. Zechariah had pretty much given up hope that he would ever have children and honestly didn't really think what the angel said would come true. Maybe that's why children believe things so easily--they haven't seen their hopes destroyed as much as adults have.
Anyway, I'll conclude the story:
"The angel answered, 'The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the holy one to be born will be called the Son of God. Even Elizabeth your relative is going to have a child in her old age, and she who was said to be barren is in her sixth month. For nothing is impossible with God.'"
Nothing is impossible with God. Absolutely true, incredibly comforting. Now for Mary's response:
"'I am the Lord's servant,' Mary answered. 'May it be to me as you have said.'"
I honestly don't think I would have responded like that. I mean, what the angel said would happen would probably ruin her reputation. It would almost certainly change her plans for her life! But she still accepted God's plan and accepted it graciously. What an incredible girl.
There is obviously more to the story, but with as long as I've taken with this part, I think that should be saved for another day (or several other days). Or you could read it yourself. I'd love to hear other people's insights on one of my favorite stories!
"Many have undertaken to draw up an account of the things that have been fulfilled among us, just as they were handed down to us by those who from the first were eyewitnesses and servants of the word. Therefore, since I myself have carefully investigated everything from the beginning, it seemed good also to me to write an orderly account for you, most excellent Theophilus, so that you may know the certainty of the things you have been taught."
At another point yesterday morning, Mom had pointed out to me that I'm a researcher. I like taking the time to look stuff up and really understand and think about what I'm writing or talking about. She's absolutely right. But after reading these verses, I understand better why I like Luke--he researched it, made sure he knew what he was talking about, and he wrote it as a letter, which is an awesome way to tell a story!
Well, now that you know I like the book of Luke and a few reasons why, I'll get on with the story. So, Luke 1 is about the angel Gabriel's appearances to both the priest Zechariah and Mary, the future mother of Jesus. This is what Luke says about Zechariah and his wife Elizabeth:
"In the time of Herod king of Judea there was a priest named Zechariah, who belonged to the priestly division of Abijah; his wife Elizabeth was also a descendant of Aaron. Both of them were upright in the sight of God, observing all the Lord's commandments and regulations blamelessly. But they had no children, because Elizabeth was barren; and they were both well along in years."
Basically, they followed all of God's commands, yet he had not blessed them with what was considered one of the greatest in that day: children.
The story continues, and Zechariah, as a priest is selected to enter the Holy Place in the Temple to burn incense before the Lord. As he was performing his duty, an angel appeared to him and told him that his wife Elizabeth would become pregnant and give birth to a son, who was to be named John. The angel told Zechariah that his son would "be great in the sight of the Lord", that he would "be filled with the Holy Spirit even from birth", and that he would "go on before the Lord, in the spirit and power of Elijah, to turn the hearts of the fathers to their children and the disobedient to the wisdom of the righteous--to make ready a people prepared for the Lord." Zechariah was obviously surprised, but he didn't necessarily believe this message, as we see from his reply:
"Zechariah asked the angel, 'How can I be sure of this? I am an old man and my wife is well along in years.'" (Notice he didn't call her "old" also ;))
"The angel answered, 'I am Gabriel. I stand in the presence of God, and I have been sent to speak to you and to tell you this good news. And now you will be silent and not able to speak until the day this happens, because you did not believe my words, which will come true at their proper time.'"
And so it happened. Everything the Gabriel said would happen did. Six months later, Gabriel went to Nazareth, in Galilee, "to a virgin pledged to be married to a man named Joseph, a descendant of David. The virgin's name was Mary." Listen to this greeting:
"The angel went to her and said, 'Greetings, you who are highly favored! The Lord is with you.'"
Now, compare Mary's reaction with Zechariah's:
Zechariah: "When Zechariah saw him, he was startled and was gripped with fear."
Mary: "Mary was greatly troubled at his words and wondered what kind of greeting this might be."
Gabriel gave Mary this message:
"Do not be afraid, Mary, you have found favor with God. You will be with child and give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus. He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his father David, and he will reign over the house of Jacob forever; his kingdom will never end."
(You're probably noticing that I'm doing less paraphrasing now and more quoting. That's because it's just that good the way it is.)
What an incredible message! As well as confusing and somewhat frightening, I would think. This is what Mary said:
"How will this be," Mary asked the angel, "since I am a virgin?"
Very logical. Now, look at the differences between Zechariah's "How?" and Mary's "How?" Zechariah asked, "How do I know this will happen?" Mary asked, "How is that possible?" Mary didn't question whether or not it would happen, she was just wondering how. Zechariah had pretty much given up hope that he would ever have children and honestly didn't really think what the angel said would come true. Maybe that's why children believe things so easily--they haven't seen their hopes destroyed as much as adults have.
Anyway, I'll conclude the story:
"The angel answered, 'The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the holy one to be born will be called the Son of God. Even Elizabeth your relative is going to have a child in her old age, and she who was said to be barren is in her sixth month. For nothing is impossible with God.'"
Nothing is impossible with God. Absolutely true, incredibly comforting. Now for Mary's response:
"'I am the Lord's servant,' Mary answered. 'May it be to me as you have said.'"
I honestly don't think I would have responded like that. I mean, what the angel said would happen would probably ruin her reputation. It would almost certainly change her plans for her life! But she still accepted God's plan and accepted it graciously. What an incredible girl.
There is obviously more to the story, but with as long as I've taken with this part, I think that should be saved for another day (or several other days). Or you could read it yourself. I'd love to hear other people's insights on one of my favorite stories!
WOW!!!!!!
I just realized that somehow the computer miraculously saved that one post I thought was deleted!!! (this is minutes after that last post, by the way) Thank you God! Wow. I guess I can finish it now. I guess it serves as a good warning though: ALWAYS BE CAREFUL AROUND DELETE BUTTONS! THEY CAN BE HARMFUL AND CAUSE UNEXPECTED BURSTS OF ANGRY BLOG POSTS! So, yup.
I am frankly disgusted with my delete button right now.
The delete button is only useful when used on purpose. I am so mad at myself right now. Mad at the computer is more like it. I had almost finished this incredibly long post that required a lot of copying and pasting and I was really enjoying it when I pressed something and it erased everything. Everything!!! And it wouldn't let me undo the action!! Aghhh! Honestly... and the thing was super long and had taken me like at least 45 minutes to write! Grrr.... Sometimes I wish everything could still be hand written. It's a lot harder to delete it then. If you want some idea of what I was posting about, read Luke chapter one and compare Zechariah's and Mary's reactions to the angel's messages to them. I'm too disgusted and short on time to re-type the whole thing. Maybe I'll try again in a few days. And yes, I know this does not meet the minimum of 300 words. I'll do something more later. Maybe I'll write it all by hand before I type it here so I can't accidentally delete it all.
Monday, December 3, 2012
Ramblings
I would write about Christmas, but it seems like everyone's doing that. Or winter, but that's the same deal. I want to do something different!! Not that I can think of anything...
Ooh, wait, ideas are popping up, the little people running my brain are frantically shoving random files into my 'blog post idea' data reader. Well, they're not so random, mainly revolving around creative writing, but I suppose that's just because those are the files most needed recently and are the most convenient to grab and shove into a data reader.
So, writing update: I've written very little, but I've done some outlining. I have an itch to write and write and write, but so far I haven't. I'm hoping to change that in the next few days.
I had thought about posting one of my old story starter ideas, but then decided against it since I've shown them to pretty much everyone in my close circle. Another reason to write something new!
Then I thought of writing a conversation between Aubrinn and Drey and me. I have to say, it would be amusing! But a lot of work too. They aren't always very talkative, especially Drey, and neither am I. Not to mention we tend to start arguing, even if it's just in jest, because I tease them about not doing what I want and they reply that I wrote them in the first place. And then I remember that all my writing problems really are my fault, not the characters'. Most of the problems are plot problems anyway.
Just now I was thinking of posting some pictures, but I didn't know what they should be of. I didn't find any among the ones on this computer that I wanted to post, and I don't really want to upload any right now. So no pictures. Sorry.
I have officially passed the 300 word minimum now, so I don't have to keep rambling on about nothing in particular. Although it turned out to be kinda fun after all!
Ooh, wait, ideas are popping up, the little people running my brain are frantically shoving random files into my 'blog post idea' data reader. Well, they're not so random, mainly revolving around creative writing, but I suppose that's just because those are the files most needed recently and are the most convenient to grab and shove into a data reader.
So, writing update: I've written very little, but I've done some outlining. I have an itch to write and write and write, but so far I haven't. I'm hoping to change that in the next few days.
I had thought about posting one of my old story starter ideas, but then decided against it since I've shown them to pretty much everyone in my close circle. Another reason to write something new!
Then I thought of writing a conversation between Aubrinn and Drey and me. I have to say, it would be amusing! But a lot of work too. They aren't always very talkative, especially Drey, and neither am I. Not to mention we tend to start arguing, even if it's just in jest, because I tease them about not doing what I want and they reply that I wrote them in the first place. And then I remember that all my writing problems really are my fault, not the characters'. Most of the problems are plot problems anyway.
Just now I was thinking of posting some pictures, but I didn't know what they should be of. I didn't find any among the ones on this computer that I wanted to post, and I don't really want to upload any right now. So no pictures. Sorry.
I have officially passed the 300 word minimum now, so I don't have to keep rambling on about nothing in particular. Although it turned out to be kinda fun after all!
Monday, November 26, 2012
On Journaling
I never used to be able to journal. The very idea of journaling brought out reactions in my head like, 'What? I'm supposed to write something without planning the whole thing first?' and 'Write what I'm thinking... ok... How is that supposed to work? That would mean thinking about what I'm thinking! Do I even know what I'm thinking?' In case you hadn't noticed, I like writing from a plan. Which is why you are reading a blog post about journaling. Anyway, journaling never really worked for me, and I tried. It was pathetic.
But then, this August, I had a lot of stuff that I was thinking about. A lot. I needed some outlet for my thoughts, and talking through them was not my idea of a good outlet ;), so I tried journaling. And it worked! I just kinda dumped my thoughts on the paper and it took so much to keep my pencil going at the same pace as my mind that I didn't have time to plan it out. And since then, I've been able to journal. Well, sort of. It's easy if I have something to write about (a.k.a. I still prefer to have a plan), so I often let my thoughts boil for a while and then dump them. It can be kind of uncomfortable, especially if I'm really bothered about what I'm thinking about, but once I'm done, God gives me so much peace about whatever it is. Sometimes it takes a few different 'journaling sessions', but writing out my thoughts helps me stop thinking about whatever's bothering me.
From my experience, I could come to the conclusion that journaling is only easy for the people with big problems to write about or the people who make a big deal out of their little problems. But actually, I think that the people who journal easily are those who are willing to admit their thoughts, albeit only to themselves and God. There is something about journaling, at least for me, that makes your thoughts concrete. They're 'real' once they're written down. Sometimes that's great, and incredibly helpful for clarifying what I really think. But sometimes it's almost scary. If I write something in my journal, that means I've been thinking about it, and it's probably been boiling there for a short time. But what if I don't want to think about it? It's easier to ignore something if you don't accept its existence. And pushing a thought out of the way takes less work than taking the time to journal about it. Maybe I have some strange idea that if I don't journal it, it's not really that big of a deal and I'll just forget about it.
Who am I kidding? I've already seen that journaling helps. Now that I've figured out how to do it, I enjoy it. I guess it's the same old thing of not wanting to share what I'm feeling, even with myself. (Sorry, bunny trail, but I just had a sudden thought of making Aubrinn journal... *mischievous grin*). I know talking about my feelings and opinions is never something I enjoy, but writing them isn't usually as much of a problem. Journaling is just too much like talking to myself, I suppose.
I don't really have a conclusion for this. I (amazingly) didn't have a full plan for this post before I started it. I knew I was going to write about journaling, but I just figured I'd start and let it come to something deeper if it did. I guess it worked. At least I learned something from it, if no one else did!
But then, this August, I had a lot of stuff that I was thinking about. A lot. I needed some outlet for my thoughts, and talking through them was not my idea of a good outlet ;), so I tried journaling. And it worked! I just kinda dumped my thoughts on the paper and it took so much to keep my pencil going at the same pace as my mind that I didn't have time to plan it out. And since then, I've been able to journal. Well, sort of. It's easy if I have something to write about (a.k.a. I still prefer to have a plan), so I often let my thoughts boil for a while and then dump them. It can be kind of uncomfortable, especially if I'm really bothered about what I'm thinking about, but once I'm done, God gives me so much peace about whatever it is. Sometimes it takes a few different 'journaling sessions', but writing out my thoughts helps me stop thinking about whatever's bothering me.
From my experience, I could come to the conclusion that journaling is only easy for the people with big problems to write about or the people who make a big deal out of their little problems. But actually, I think that the people who journal easily are those who are willing to admit their thoughts, albeit only to themselves and God. There is something about journaling, at least for me, that makes your thoughts concrete. They're 'real' once they're written down. Sometimes that's great, and incredibly helpful for clarifying what I really think. But sometimes it's almost scary. If I write something in my journal, that means I've been thinking about it, and it's probably been boiling there for a short time. But what if I don't want to think about it? It's easier to ignore something if you don't accept its existence. And pushing a thought out of the way takes less work than taking the time to journal about it. Maybe I have some strange idea that if I don't journal it, it's not really that big of a deal and I'll just forget about it.
Who am I kidding? I've already seen that journaling helps. Now that I've figured out how to do it, I enjoy it. I guess it's the same old thing of not wanting to share what I'm feeling, even with myself. (Sorry, bunny trail, but I just had a sudden thought of making Aubrinn journal... *mischievous grin*). I know talking about my feelings and opinions is never something I enjoy, but writing them isn't usually as much of a problem. Journaling is just too much like talking to myself, I suppose.
I don't really have a conclusion for this. I (amazingly) didn't have a full plan for this post before I started it. I knew I was going to write about journaling, but I just figured I'd start and let it come to something deeper if it did. I guess it worked. At least I learned something from it, if no one else did!
Tuesday, November 20, 2012
Pride and Thanksgiving
Deuteronomy 8:11-14
'Be careful that you do not forget the LORD your God, failing to observe his commands, his laws, and his decrees that I am giving you this day. Otherwise, when you eat and are satisfied, when you build fine houses and settle down, and when your herds and flocks grow large and your silver and gold increase and when all you have is multiplied, then your heart will become proud and you will forget the LORD your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery.'
How easy it is to forget where everything we have came from! We do live in a land of plenty. But how often do we give God the glory for even the ability to have something we like for lunch? I know I myself often take it all for granted. I enjoy the pleasures and ease of my life, but I don't want to forget God. I don't want my heart to become proud!
In my quiet time this morning, I read Daniel chapter 4. I (obviously) don't have room (or time) to write the whole chapter here, but I'll give you a summary. Basically, King Nebuchadnezzar has a disturbing dream about a tree that gets chopped down and a messenger that proclaims the doom of the tree. Daniel interprets the dream for the king, and tells him that it is a prophecy about what is to come. He says God has declared that Nebuchadnezzar will lose his sanity and live like a cow for seven periods of time because of his pride. Daniel warns the king to abandon his pride in his accomplishments in hopes that the punishment will be removed, but Nebuchadnezzar obviously does not. Here's verses 29-30: "Twelve months later, as the king was walking on the roof of the royal palace of Babylon, he said, 'Is not this the great Babylon I have built as the royal residence, by my mighty power and for the glory of my majesty?'" His 'silver and gold increase[d] and all he ha[d was] multiplied' and his 'heart [became] proud.' He took the credit for the splendor and glory of Babylon.
And so, the prophecy came true. As soon as this happened, King Nebuchadnezzar's sanity left him and he was driven out to the wilderness where he lived like a cow for seven periods of time, until his hair was like eagles' feathers and his nails like birds' claws. Then, finally, he remembered God. Listen to what happened (verses 34-36): "At the end of that time, I, Nebuchadnezzar, raised my eyes toward heaven, and my sanity was restored. Then I praised the Most High; I honored and glorified him who lives forever. His dominion is an eternal dominion; his kingdom endures from generation to generation. All the peoples of the earth are regarded as nothing. He does as he pleases with the powers of heaven and the peoples of the earth. No one can hold back his hand or say to him: 'What have you done?' At the same time that my sanity was restored, my honor and splendor were returned to me for the glory of my kingdom. My advisers and nobles sought me out, and I was restored to my throne and became even greater than before." When he remembered God, his sanity was restored, as was his kingdom. He learned a valuable lesson about what happens when you forget to thank God for what you have!
As we approach Thanksgiving this week, I want to make an effort to remember God and all He has blessed me with. I'll probably forget. It happens every day. But, as Nebuchadnezzar says as he concludes Daniel four, "those who walk in pride he is able to humble." I might not be able to humble myself, but God will humble me. I hope He will help me to humble myself, though, since I'd rather stay human. Living like a cow sounds much less enjoyable than remembering God's blessings!
'Be careful that you do not forget the LORD your God, failing to observe his commands, his laws, and his decrees that I am giving you this day. Otherwise, when you eat and are satisfied, when you build fine houses and settle down, and when your herds and flocks grow large and your silver and gold increase and when all you have is multiplied, then your heart will become proud and you will forget the LORD your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery.'
How easy it is to forget where everything we have came from! We do live in a land of plenty. But how often do we give God the glory for even the ability to have something we like for lunch? I know I myself often take it all for granted. I enjoy the pleasures and ease of my life, but I don't want to forget God. I don't want my heart to become proud!
In my quiet time this morning, I read Daniel chapter 4. I (obviously) don't have room (or time) to write the whole chapter here, but I'll give you a summary. Basically, King Nebuchadnezzar has a disturbing dream about a tree that gets chopped down and a messenger that proclaims the doom of the tree. Daniel interprets the dream for the king, and tells him that it is a prophecy about what is to come. He says God has declared that Nebuchadnezzar will lose his sanity and live like a cow for seven periods of time because of his pride. Daniel warns the king to abandon his pride in his accomplishments in hopes that the punishment will be removed, but Nebuchadnezzar obviously does not. Here's verses 29-30: "Twelve months later, as the king was walking on the roof of the royal palace of Babylon, he said, 'Is not this the great Babylon I have built as the royal residence, by my mighty power and for the glory of my majesty?'" His 'silver and gold increase[d] and all he ha[d was] multiplied' and his 'heart [became] proud.' He took the credit for the splendor and glory of Babylon.
And so, the prophecy came true. As soon as this happened, King Nebuchadnezzar's sanity left him and he was driven out to the wilderness where he lived like a cow for seven periods of time, until his hair was like eagles' feathers and his nails like birds' claws. Then, finally, he remembered God. Listen to what happened (verses 34-36): "At the end of that time, I, Nebuchadnezzar, raised my eyes toward heaven, and my sanity was restored. Then I praised the Most High; I honored and glorified him who lives forever. His dominion is an eternal dominion; his kingdom endures from generation to generation. All the peoples of the earth are regarded as nothing. He does as he pleases with the powers of heaven and the peoples of the earth. No one can hold back his hand or say to him: 'What have you done?' At the same time that my sanity was restored, my honor and splendor were returned to me for the glory of my kingdom. My advisers and nobles sought me out, and I was restored to my throne and became even greater than before." When he remembered God, his sanity was restored, as was his kingdom. He learned a valuable lesson about what happens when you forget to thank God for what you have!
As we approach Thanksgiving this week, I want to make an effort to remember God and all He has blessed me with. I'll probably forget. It happens every day. But, as Nebuchadnezzar says as he concludes Daniel four, "those who walk in pride he is able to humble." I might not be able to humble myself, but God will humble me. I hope He will help me to humble myself, though, since I'd rather stay human. Living like a cow sounds much less enjoyable than remembering God's blessings!
Thursday, November 8, 2012
Telling Me to Write
Me: I love writing stories!
Myself: Then why don't you write more often?
Me: Well, I just don't have much time...
Myself: Hmph, yeah right! You don't have much time?
Me: What? Between school and other activities, I really don't have a lot of time!
Myself: Sure.... but you still manage to have plenty of time on the computer, don't you?
Me: I guess so. But, well, I just need a break after all that hard brain work I do in school.
Myself: Oh, is that it? I was thinking you might just be putting off writing because it sounds hard and you know it will be.
Me: Ok, so that's part of it too. I just never know if I'm going to have any ideas and I don't want to waste time just sitting there thinking.
Myself: So wasting time mindlessly browsing the internet is better? You amaze me. I've heard you complain about having too many ideas and now you say you don't have any?!
Me: I don't like to start so many stories at once. What if I never finish them?
Myself: Are you worried about them taking up space or something? Write! Even if you can't even read it later, it's good practice to put your thoughts on paper! You don't have to finish something for it to be beneficial, you know.
Me: Yeah, I know... I just wish I had more time.
Myself: Did you hear anything I just said?!
If you made it all the way through that, you've seen a part of the inside of my head. A daily argument between Me and Myself. A confusing problem. I truly love stories and love writing them, yet I never seem to get around to it. Why don't just make myself sit there and write at least something? I'm not really sure. I'm probably lazy. I probably waste my time on other things.
I'd like to change that. To change my habits. This past week my sister and I participated in an electronic media fast for our Worldview class. I didn't feel like I'd learned much from it until we talked about it in class yesterday. (I know this doesn't seem at all related. Just wait, it's coming.) None of us in the class spend excessive amounts of time on media, but we realized that the time you spend or the content you take in is not the only problem. You see, I discovered that I can't just stop using media, I have to make an effort to actually do something worth doing with my extra time. It made me think, what else could I be doing with the time I spend on media? Want to guess what Myself told Me I could do? Write!!
So now I'm going to be carrying around a notebook. Anytime I have a few minutes that aren't filled up and I don't want to start something big because I know I only have a few minutes, I'll pull out my notebook and write something. If I have longer periods of time, I'll go down to my room and work on my novel. At least, that's what I want to do. It'll still take some work. Myself will have to convince Me every day for awhile, I'm guessing. I'm praying every day for God's help to make myself do what I should be doing! I'm also thanking God for the friends He gave me who have similar interests in writing who can hold me accountable :). And I'm thankful that He forgives me when I waste the time He gave me and gives me another whole day every morning to try again.
~Savanna
Myself: Then why don't you write more often?
Me: Well, I just don't have much time...
Myself: Hmph, yeah right! You don't have much time?
Me: What? Between school and other activities, I really don't have a lot of time!
Myself: Sure.... but you still manage to have plenty of time on the computer, don't you?
Me: I guess so. But, well, I just need a break after all that hard brain work I do in school.
Myself: Oh, is that it? I was thinking you might just be putting off writing because it sounds hard and you know it will be.
Me: Ok, so that's part of it too. I just never know if I'm going to have any ideas and I don't want to waste time just sitting there thinking.
Myself: So wasting time mindlessly browsing the internet is better? You amaze me. I've heard you complain about having too many ideas and now you say you don't have any?!
Me: I don't like to start so many stories at once. What if I never finish them?
Myself: Are you worried about them taking up space or something? Write! Even if you can't even read it later, it's good practice to put your thoughts on paper! You don't have to finish something for it to be beneficial, you know.
Me: Yeah, I know... I just wish I had more time.
Myself: Did you hear anything I just said?!
If you made it all the way through that, you've seen a part of the inside of my head. A daily argument between Me and Myself. A confusing problem. I truly love stories and love writing them, yet I never seem to get around to it. Why don't just make myself sit there and write at least something? I'm not really sure. I'm probably lazy. I probably waste my time on other things.
I'd like to change that. To change my habits. This past week my sister and I participated in an electronic media fast for our Worldview class. I didn't feel like I'd learned much from it until we talked about it in class yesterday. (I know this doesn't seem at all related. Just wait, it's coming.) None of us in the class spend excessive amounts of time on media, but we realized that the time you spend or the content you take in is not the only problem. You see, I discovered that I can't just stop using media, I have to make an effort to actually do something worth doing with my extra time. It made me think, what else could I be doing with the time I spend on media? Want to guess what Myself told Me I could do? Write!!
So now I'm going to be carrying around a notebook. Anytime I have a few minutes that aren't filled up and I don't want to start something big because I know I only have a few minutes, I'll pull out my notebook and write something. If I have longer periods of time, I'll go down to my room and work on my novel. At least, that's what I want to do. It'll still take some work. Myself will have to convince Me every day for awhile, I'm guessing. I'm praying every day for God's help to make myself do what I should be doing! I'm also thanking God for the friends He gave me who have similar interests in writing who can hold me accountable :). And I'm thankful that He forgives me when I waste the time He gave me and gives me another whole day every morning to try again.
~Savanna
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