I was looking over my past journals a little bit earlier this week (mainly because they are now in the plural form! I filled up the last pages of my second journal a few days ago). I didn't look closely or in depth or anything, but I did notice the dates I started and finished each one. It's been about two years since I started the first one, but I only started the second one in November.
I believe I've mentioned this before, but it was only this past August that I really began to journal more frequently and find it helpful. And I only really journal when I've been thinking deeply about something and need to get all my thoughts out. Well, I've been thinking a lot this school year, about the future, mainly, and all that jazz, and I think that fact and all my notes from the Daniel Bible study explain the rapidity with which my second journal filled up.
The way I journal, I rarely just sit down and write a page each day or something like that. No, it's more like mull over something for a few days, then write four or five pages worth in messy handwriting because I'm going so fast. But I really do think that's an improvement from how I used to be. I used to never be able to journal because I planned out my writing way too much in my head to actually write my thoughts. It sounded like I had planned it out. To be honest, I was rather frustrated. I'm so glad God gave me the ability to journal through these last few years, because it really helps me understand what I'm thinking. If you know me, you know I don't particularly like to share my thoughts and feelings out loud, but journaling gives me a way to figure it out even without saying it. Does that make any sense? Writing down my thoughts helps me evaluate them and 'catch' the ones I know aren't right. Then I can take them to God and ask for his help with specific things and specific thoughts. Overall, it really just helps me know what my thoughts and feelings are and it relieves a little of that weight from my mind and heart.
Anyway, I guess what this really comes back to is the short story I'm writing for English class. I a enjoying the assignment tremendously, but I've been having a hard time getting my rough draft 'out', so to speak. I can see the story in my head, but transferring it into words is harder than it sounds! I think part of the perfectionist in me is afraid to write something 'rough'. I want to get it right the first time. But I've been trying (and asking all the time for God's help!) to let the story pour out of me as if I'm journaling. I can fix it up later. So far, God has provided so much! I have a couple written pages already today, and I'm going back to it after this. I can't tell you how thankful I am. I enjoy writing, but it's not easy! A verse that has really encouraged me through this is Philippians 4:6-7. I don't have time to put it here, but please go look it up! It's a familiar verse, but so encouraging!
Keep up the good work, all the rest of you working on stories too! I can't wait to read them :D!
I'm glad you're enjoying your writing, even if it is a challenge! I'm looking forward to reading it.
ReplyDeleteI love journaling, too, though I have not been as consistent in it this year as I was the past few years. I love looking through my old journals, though. It's so encouraging to see how God worked to change me, bring me through many challenges, and bless me through many people and experiences. I can re-live some of the thoughts and feelings as I read those pages. You won't regret it if you keep up the discipline of journaling!